Epiphanies

(I sink into my thoughts as questions consume me.

What can I do when I learn the truth? 

What can I do when I learn of others?) 

I died a little today when I looked around the world in jealousy. 

I want to see the beauty in the clouds as they drift in the sky. 

I want to see the beauty of a flower in full bloom and the strength it has when it holds up against the winds that beat against it. 

I want to feel the warmth of the sun on my skin and know that the days will get better. 

I died a little today when I thought of my being filled with the lie that my skin is my culture. 

I want to see the beauty of the people around me.

I want to be happy in the happiness of others.

I want to remember the souls of my brothers and sisters, the humans that cover the globe. 

I want every life to matter because the poor, the broken, the beaten, and the Black matter. 

I died a little today when I remembered my own hatred of others. 

I cannot stand in my selfishness and see the hurt of others. 

I cannot sleep in my weariness and know the peace of slumber until I know the peace of loving others. 

It is the peace that comes with the pain of my world collapsing. 

It is the peace that triumphs in the fire. 

I died a little today to find that I really want to live.

What can I do but love.